This is something I wrote a few years ago that my old swinging partner and I used to send to new couples who would message us looking to dip their toes in the water but were still understandably a bit nervous. I got good feedback from it, so I thought I’d share it here for any couples who might be thinking about having ‘the conversation’ about swinging. Some of it is from a male-female couple viewpoint, but most of it I think works for all genders and sexualities.
Make sure this is something both of you 100% want to do. If one of you is just going along with it to please the other, then it’s not going to work and it could seriously damage your relationship
Make sure you’re both comfortable with seeing your partner fucking someone else. To us, it’s a hell of a turn on seeing each other getting satisfied – it’s like an epic kind of porn. If you don’t think you can handle it, it’s best that you work it out now rather than later when it could become awkward.
Don’t be nervous about getting naked with another couple. If you’re already contemplating exploring this world, then we’d hazard a guess that you’re both fairly open-minded people. There’s no need to feel embarrassed about your bodies – we all have the same basic equipment and nobody’s going to judge. Also, if the guy is straight, in a same-room swap situation, it’s quite possible that we may end up being naked in close proximity to each other. Don’t worry, I’m not going to suddenly jump you! Sometimes things touch, but it’s nothing to worry about.
Be open and honest about what you like and dislike, and what you’re up for and what you’re not up for. For example, anal or pain, or any blood/shit/urine stuff. As long as you set out your personal limits beforehand, everyone will have a good time.
and finally and most importantly,
Enjoy yourselves. Sex is one of the most fun things there is, and in our opinion it’s even better when more people are involved. Wanna try something you’ve always been ashamed to ask for before? Let us know and we’ll make your fantasies a reality. As long as everyone’s clean, safe, and open about their limits, then great times are ahead.